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Ambivalence
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The Splinters
I've tried so much to reform
What has uprooted it from myself
And threw it in your face
As a dirty cloth.
Forgive me for my contradictious feelings.
Once they will be crushed with indifference
And I'll quietly rejoice at this.
Oh, please, cut my soul
Even deeper, than you like.
Eviscerate again and again,
The all rotten insides
Of my good intentions,
Which are so easy to mock at.
Break the glass wall,
Behind which you hide your humanity,
Break to thousands of splinters
And let they pierce yours plasticine thoughts,
These ugly logic chains.
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I want to see, how you'll be cut.
I want to see, how you'll awake.
I want to see, how you'll regain your sight.
I want to see, how you'll reborn.
Ask me about my thoughts,
Pass on splinters above the brink of chasm,
At which I am afraid to glance.
Go and I'll laugh at you and at myself,
Laugh so loudly
That you'll drop down and fall
Below my masochism,
Below general immorality.
You will see yourself from the other side
And will perceive your baseness,
And being in despair you'll be frightened
And will lose your mind
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