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Rhett and Link
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I'm A Texpert (Rap Battle)
Rhett & Link
perfected my patented method
The second handset hands-free toe text
I ride with my Swedish Masseuse
She gimme deep tissue thumb shiatzu
My yogi shows me hand yoga poses like
Downward Facing Pinky and Thumb Lotus
I'll never stoop so low as to text photos
Instead I text the correct combo of ones and zeros
I'm an artiste using ASCII
I just texted this toad to an art gallery
I text more than the next bored pre-pubescent tween
In fact I've text-induced my own second puberty
How does that work exactly?
Everything that happened before is happening some more
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That's all I'm comfortable sharing at this time
I gave a lift to a drifter
And texted his estranged sister
And now I'm hostin' em here for dinner
Well did I mention I'm a text-itrician?
A next-gen OB/GYN, a Lamaze text-nician
Well, I'm the next Dr. Phil of SMS
I'm poppin' out babies with the power of text!
By the way, where're you headed son?
Headed West on 421
421?
Uh-huh
West?
Yes. You?
Me? I'm headed-
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