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Professor Elemental
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Wages of Gin
Oh dear, I've been sick in the sink
You know that phrase is later than you think
Well, it's later than that! I must've fell on the cat
Laid down, face down on the welcome-mat
Unwelcome monkeys in my head with hammers
So hungover, I'd prefer them to sammer
Dogs look at me and say I look rough
Voice like a lumberjack ever so gruff
Lupi is a groupie, there was never enough
And now one whiff is already to much
I can't face the public
The mirror is my enemy
Seeking every remedy
... had my tea
Send myself to bed undreadful
Yes, I'm quite a mess indeed
All my friends have left me
All I've left, a fuzzy memory
Skibadip, bididup
Skidilibab, dudi
How am I to get home?
Had a little too much whoopi soup
All I meant to take was one
Oh! Now my head is going loopi-loop
Some stout a kid one bun, oh!
One, two, three four
One, two, three (three), four
Son, two, three, four
One, two, three
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There's a horse in the hallway
The westwing's still on fire
That weird smell's been there all day
Someone I know is a liar
They said a drink wouldn't hurt
But my mouth's full of dirt
The emergency services are on alert
Someone stole my curtains and they've gone beserk
Turned them into togas and gone to work
The kitchen is disgusting
Toilet's probably plastered
Don't know why I do this
I'd only just dusted
I need bacon, sedatives, heavy medication
A new liver delivered and a year of medication
Aching, heaving, last guest leaving
I have to get it all ready for the next set this evening
(Quickly!)
(They could be here any minute)
Skibadip, bididup
Skidilibab, dudi
How am I to get home?
Had a little too much whoopi soup
All I meant to take was one
Oh! Now my head is going loopi-loop
Some spout a kid one bun, oh!
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